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Coming Out

What is “Coming Out”?

Simply put, to come out is to tell someone a secret that you’ve been keeping to yourself. That secret can be anything; you might come out to your friends that you once ate a roly-poly because you thought it was a chocolate ball, if you want to. However, here, we’d like to talk about sexuality. Coming Out as non-heterosexual can be hard because people might not understand when you are different from them, just like your friends might think it’s gross that you ate a roly-poly and unfriend you on Facebook, even though there is nothing morally wrong about eating a roly-poly.

Is it necessary to come out?

No. It’s totally up to you, no one else but you. You don’t have to come out if you’re not ready. And think about this, the heterosexual people don’t really have to come out, saying “Hey, I’m straight!”. So, why do you have to?

Why are we talking about this then? Because, even though it is not necessary, it will let people know you more. It can boost your self-esteem, and you might feel more connected to people around you. That doesn’t sound so bad, is it?

However, it might also expose you to victimization; bullying at school, harassment, assault and so on. If you come out to your parents, chances are, they might not understand you. Some parents would tell their child that homosexuality (or other non-heterosexual identity) is just a phase that shall pass when you grow up. Some even go further to try to turn you straight. However, there are also parents who understand this issue very well.

That is why you have to balance all the pros and cons above, considering circumstance around you. If you think people around you will take it well, then it might be preferable to come out. If not, you do not have to. Before Coming Out to anyone, consulting is one of the choices that you have. But it is important to choose a right person to consult. You may start with calling free hotlines for sexual minority.
Try to contact here.

When and Who to come out?

This is also up to you. You don’t have to come out to EVERYONE. You can just tell people whom you want them to know you more. And it can be anytime you feel comfortable to say. However, Coming Out, when having a quarrel or a fight, may not be a good idea.